What did you think of the relationship between Billie and her mother? How do Billie’s feelings about her mother change over the course of the novel? Does Dixie go through a similar change?
Their relationship is strained but deeply intertwined. Billie sees her mother as both a source of pressure and vulnerability. Over time, there’s a shift toward mutual, if imperfect, understanding. Dixie also seems to soften, recognizing Billie’s differences more clearly.
So much about Dixie is revealed after her MS diagnosis. We see how difficult her life was as a pregnant orphaned teenager. Dixie started self-medicating with alcohol to subdue her early MS symptoms. She was dealt a terrible blow when she lost her husband and became the sole supported of her family. I was so happy that in the end Billie and her mother were able to voice their love for each other. I agree with the book’s statement that you have to forgive your parents their shortcomings.
They had a strained relationship while Billie was growing up. I think that was normal based on the circumstances. Through the years, Billie’s maturity and knowledge helped her understand her mother’s behavior and it led to an understanding and fogiveness.
During most of Billie’s life she did not have a warm, loving relationship with her mother. Dixie was not forthcoming about her background and her feelings and thus distanced herself emotionally from her daughter. Also, I think Billie had unresolved anger issues bout her father’s death and the fact that she was left with the parent .whose cold, distant demeanor changed her world completely. It was not until Billie gained some insight through maturity that she could see the big picture more clearly. It also helped that Dixie started opening up about her earlier life while previously she had dismissed Billie’s questions about this period. In addition, Dixie’s illness and Billie’s devotion as a caregiver brought them closer together.
Billie did not have a loving mother. As the novel went on we learned how hard her mother’s life had been. When her mother had MS she opened up and told Billie about her young life. Billie then could under her more and realize why she had been so cold.
I really didn’t feel like Billie’s mother gave her any warmth or helped her develop a sense of who she was. Billie spends so much time trying to figure her out and just wanting to be seen by her. At the same time, Dixie is kind of just who she is—shaped by her own past. This is probably the only way she knows how to love, but it’s not what Billie needs
For most of the book I did not like Billie’s mother. Then as the difficulty of her life coupled with having to suddenly become the support of the family I began to have empathy for her. Those days in the 50’s were not easy for a woman. The closeness Billie had to her father was an additional obstacle to the relationship.
There seem to be a variety of reasons that Billie and Dixie had a strained relationship. I seem to recall that Dixie had goals for her life until she got pregnant and had to marry Billie’s father. This may have caused resentment early on which then drove Billie to being closer with her father. That closeness could have then made the distances between her and Dixie even greater. In addition, I am sure it is not easy to parent an autistic child which could have made Dixie resent Billie even more, especially since she was a quasi-single parent because Billie’s father was on the road almost all time. Even though it was apparent that Billie preferred her father, it was readily apparent that Dixie did the heavy lifting on the home front. Dixie seemed to mellow after she was diagnoses with MS and Billie came of age and took on more responsibility.