Nell watches Evie interact with Hazel and thinks, “One never outgrows the need for a mother…or at least the desire to be mothered.” What do you think of this statement? Do you agree with it?
My mother died July 1999 and I miss her everyday. She called me every Saturday night. I drove to Seattle once a month to see her after dad died in 1990. Often when something good or funny happens I think I need to tell mom! I do agree, in my case, I did love being mothered. She was my best friend and I do regret I never told her that.
I do agree with this statement. Our relations ship with our parents, especially our mothers is the first and for many one of the most enduring bonds one will forge. It sets the stage for our future relationships, and when that bond is severed early in life the loss can be devastating.
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It doesn’t have to be the biological mother. Becca benefited from Lottie’s love and protection - as Evie did from Hazel’s. Yes Hazel was distant, but she thought she had to be to continue to protect Evie - and Nell.
In her way, Bret protected her girls - she even protected Drew and Walt.
Lottie also protected the child of Dory and Josh by leaving so they would marry and provide a home for him.
Love manifests in a number of ways in this book.
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I agree with Lyris that it doesn’t have to be a biological mother.
Paula_Walters, have no doubts your mom knew how you felt. Coming monthly and having weekly calls told her more than words could ever do. You both were fortunate to have each other.
Lyris, I agree. I often find that a found family, of non-biological family members can be more powerful and loving than a biological family. Sometimes relatives are just not in place that they can be a strong, caring family member. I liked seeing all the caring relationships.
I completely agree and believe that mothers or mother figures play a vital role for children - and continue to be so important as we age. I am so thankful for my mother’s love and presence in my life!
Thank you for your kind words!
I do think we never outgrow our need for a mother figure. I was twenty when I lost my mother and still hold her memory close, 50+ years later. There were women along the way, blood related and not, who I did feel mothered by. I treasure the relationship I have with my adult daughter - it meant a lot when she told me recently that she is so glad we have each other.
I totally agree, even now in my senior years, I think of my mother and her unconditional love. She was a very high strung young mother but she mellowed into one the strongest, loving fun person as she aged. I thank her for her strength, wisdom and love she shared with all of our family.
Mothering was a key theme in this book–in the actual mothers and found mothers. Evie needed Hazel after losing Becca. Nell missed the connection she’d known before Evie came. Becca longed for her child and missed her found mother, Lottie. Being cared for the way a mother cares or should care matters. It touches us, even when we have to find it in mother figures. I think we all want that in our lives.
I definitely agree with this statement. In my experience, I found comfort in knowing my mom was always there to give support and advice throughout the years. As an older person now, I miss her still.
Everyone needs some form of mothering. We have seen abused children still want to be loved by their parent.
I completely agree. I miss having a mother, or even a mother figure, in my life.
I’m one of the fortunate ones to still have my Mom, age 93, with me. As she ages, I’m spending more and more time with her and I realize what a blessing this is for me. I’m getting to know her outside of the mothering role as we spend time reminiscing on her past. Thoughts she had, decisions she made, regrets. At the same time, it is wonderful to the person who is my mom!