Lottie does not reveal her illness to Becca, as she wants Becca to be free to establish a new life with Ben. Do you think that was a good decision? What would you have done in her position?
Another example of Lottie’s unselfishness. She wants Becca to be happy. Yes, I think it was a good decision.
Becca would have wanted to stay with Lottie rather than start a new relationship with Ben. So yes because of Lottie’s love for Becca it was the right decision.
I have mixed feelings about this. I can understand why Lottie does not reveal her illness and how that gave Becca the chance for a new life with Ben. Yet, I also wish Lottie had allowed the choice to be Becca’s. When I think of what I would do, I remind myself that Ben needed work and long-distance communication then was certainly not what it is now. Today Becca might find a way to have both Lottie and Ben in her life. So maybe I would have done the same as Lottie.
I understand why Lottie did not reveal her illness. However, I think it would have been better if she had told her when she was close to the end of her life, rather than not telling her.
I think it was the correct decision. It was better for Becca and Ben. Lottie would have felt guilty if Becca had stayed with her.
I’m almost always in the camp of “more information is better.” I think Lottie could have found a way to make sure Becca still married Ben. (“If you love me, have any respect for me, you’ll go ahead with your plans.”)
I feel the “patient” should have the choice whether to share or not. She knew Becca would be torn between her and Ben and she wanted her to think forward. She did tell the lawyer her reasonings which he passed on tho Becca. Hard yes but I believe for the best in the long run. Becca had beautiful memories of their life together.
Laura, beautifully put. Choice is always good.
One of the things to keep in mind is that there were so few choices for women in those days. Lottie did what she did because of her deep love for Becca. She knew Ben would take care of Becca.
I think Lottie should have told Becca that she was ill. She could have done so after Becca and Ben were married to achieve the goal of getting them together. And what is to say that Ben wouldn’t have stood by both of them. Or maybe she could have played down her illness a bit, but still said something.
I understand Lottie’s choice of not revealing her illness to Becca. Lottie wanted Becca to be free to enjoy life with Ben. This situation rings true to one of my past experiences. When I was diagnosed with cancer, I (along with the rest of my family) determined to not tell my elderly mother. There was nothing she could do miles away but just worry which would not have helped either one of us. Of course, when I was well again after months of chemo, we did tell her. She was angry with us at first but also was relieved and forgave our omissons.
When my children were young I thought I would keep illness to myself rather than worry them. As I got older I realized not telling them might rob them of precious moments. Although Lottie made the choice that worked for her, I wouldn’t make it myself anymore. I wouldn’t want my children, or anyone I love, to wish they had had more time with me.
I think Lottie was doing what she thought was best for Becca. She knew Becca wouldn’t marry Ben if she had known Lottie was sick and Lottie was making sure Becca was safe and cared for in her future. It was such a phenomenal act of love and unselfishness on Lottie’s part.
I thought it was a very noble decision, un-selfish.