Lauren says she “has always hated being wrong, the idea of doing something that turns out to be an irredeemable mistake,” and this is what prevents her from settling down with one of the husbands. What did you think of her attitude here? When the possibility of failure or divorce is so high, how do people continue to find the faith to get married believing they are making the right decision?
She does have fears of selerctging the wrong man. The problem with these men suddenly appearing is that there is no time to build a relationship ahead of time and really. know the person who appears. She has no base on which to build these relationships.
In the beginning she mentions how her relationship with Amos was full of them finding fault of others. I found this to be a characteristic that she seemed to use with every husband. She doesn’t analyze her own behaviors which comes across (to me), as a fault of hers. Not allowing any of the relationships to grow.
Lauren has no confidence. Marriage is taking a leap into the unknown. It is not just do the act of marriage and then ride it out. Marriage is like anything else that works out well - it takes work - non stop work - from both parties. Lauren was too immature to see that as she flipped thru husbands.
I think most people hate being wrong. The difference between people is how you deal with hour mistake. It’s okay to jump in, make a mistake and then deal with the consequence respectfully.
I don’t like to be wrong either, but Lauren never gave any of the relationships time to work, time to grow and develop. She never acknowledged that she wasn’t perfect either, that she surely had habits that were annoying. In the end, she realized that if she made a mistake with Sam, she would just have to fix it the usual way, and not by throwing him back in the attic.
The relationships and husbands didn’t last long. This was the author’s way of showing the reader Lauren’s lack of confidence. I’m not sure she gave and husband a chance because she didn’t want to choose wrong. Marriage is a commitment. Lauren’s revolving door forced her to make snap decisions so that in itself, didn’t give any husband or herself a chance. You take a chance on choosing a partner and you hope it’s a life long commitment. It doesn’t always turn out that way…it’s called taking a chance!
Maybe the concern with being wrong in her decision for a husband comes from her age. I keep thinking of my situation: married my high school sweetheart after college. It never once occurred to me to question whether it was a right or wrong decision. Perhaps after having lived some more years and making a few mistakes, one is then concerned with how right or wrong that decision is.
Don’t we learn from our mistakes! Sure, mistakes are discomforting but they show us how we can be a better later on. Again, I think the author is showing us perfection is not possible. Life offers us many opportunities - some more pleasant than others.
I agree with the readers who said that Lauren didn’t spend enough time developing any relationships. How could she know if she was making a mistake so quickly or with such limited information.