Melanie and June discuss true love. June says she can’t list the reasons she loved Frank or Elwood, while Melanie states, “Those reasons are how we know it’s love.” June disagrees, saying the reasons explain why you’re attracted to the person but not why you love them, saying that love is deeper than that. “Higher.” What’s your opinion about true love? How do you tell the difference between true love and attraction?
I disagree with June, I can list why I might be attracted to someone, but I also can list reasons why I love someone. There can also be intangible things that make us love or feel attraction to someone, but there should be reasons you can identify. I feel I can be attracted to someone but not love them. Love is Higher, but also explainable.
I believe you can list the reasons for both attraction and true love. How do you tell the difference, sometimes you can’t. Sometimes the attraction changes to love and sometimes the love changes to attraction. Sometimes you have both.
June was immature and narcissistic. Yes, I believe she loved both Fran and Elwood, but her capacity to love – and understand love – was limited. That scene illustrated her rather shallow ideas about love. You can definitely enumerate the reasons you love someone in a deep, abiding way that lets you accept them exactly as they are. People who love that way can explain why they love someone in spite of their flaws and shortcomings, and why those can actually be endearing rather than repulsive. Attraction can be lasting, but it is often fleeting. It’s common to date someone because you are attracted to them, but decide that the relationship will not be lasting because that attraction is not permanent and sufficient enough to make you want to stick around when you discover the other person’s weird quirks and habits that annoy you. When you can get past those, you are moving closer to “true love.”