I agree Ann. Jane was selfish. She would have belittled the sport
I loved this book. I thought Jane’s choice to divorce was a quick solution to her feeling of a lack of control in own life with her need to control her children & husband. She felt dissatisfied with her life & didn’t know how to fix herself so she decided to run away from a life she helped create thinking there was something better.
From a male perspective, I took this as a subtle hint as to the “state of their relationship”. They are not as close as they once were. Dan does not share everything with her anymore. Someone else also indicated that perhaps he harbored a fear that she might ridicule him or not take this seriously, as he was never previously interested in this type of activity. I think that there is validity in that as well.
Dan was apparently afraid of Jane’s ridicule. Frankly, his feeling the need to hide his hobby just showed how unstable the marriage was.
Honesty and transparency in a marriage for me is critical. Lies - even by omission- erode trust.
Dan should have grown some self confidence and self respect and been straightforward. Secrets in an intimate relationships, even if for a good reason, often result in angst. (See Diana, Princess of Wales learning a dance for Prince Charles)
I agree with Kathy_D. Jane did laugh at Dan when she 1st mentioned it. Jane seems to belittle Dan often, which tends to make Dan or anyone in such a situation to be forthright about everything.
I think the same as Jane - Dan wanted something for himself. He felt he was in rut and wanted to break free of it and I don’t think he was sure exactly what the ‘rut’ detailed and if it included Jane.