Familial relationships are important to all the characters. How do Hai’s and Di’s relationship with their mom evolve throughout the book? What about Hai and Di’s relationship with each other?
Both girls assumed more responsibilities as their journey progressed; each in their own way. They depended on mom, followed their mom, and eventually found ways to enhance the family unit.
Initially, the mother is a strong, traditional figure—protective, decisive, and filled with cultural expectations. She feels the burden of survival for her daughters after the family is torn apart by political turmoil and abandonment. At first, both girls look up to her, especially Hai, who deeply respects her mother’s leadership and sacrifices. But, as their journey goes on, Hai begins questioning decisions, specifically rigid values or survival strictness. Hai grows into her own and begins to form her ethics and morals. Di, younger and seemingly more dependent, shows signs of separation, recognizing that her mother is imperfect. By the end, the mother’s authority softens into more equality. The daughters, having faced trauma and growth, come to understand her actions with more empathy.
The bond between Hai and Di is changing. At first, Hai is the protector. She is practical and cautious, while Di is more sensitive and dependent. Their differences create friction. Hai is annoyed by Di’s neediness, while Di may feel abandoned or misunderstood. Over time, their bond deepens through shared hardship, They come to rely on each other for safety, and emotional grounding.
Through the process of abandonment, all 3 learn to rely on each other. Even though Hai and Di are different in their approach to life in general, they did learn to appreciate each other and support their mother. All three did their best to survive even if meant some forgiveness of differences and serious problem solving/coping skills.