Becca places Evie in a children’s home so she can get a nursing degree. Did you know this type of home existed in the 1930s? What did you think of her decision? Under what circumstances might you make a similar choice?
I did not know a children’s home existed for a mother’s chance to get a degree and hope for a better life for a family. I thought Becca did everything she should have, by checking it out and making sure she could visit etc. I’m shocked, or maybe not because it was 1930s, but I feel that the home should have been in contact with Becca before ever making decisions regarding Evie.
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I was aware of this type of home, as I had read about it in other books. Also, a friend’s grandfather was left at a similar home, but it was not as caring as the one described in this book. I try to view these homes as a necessary solution. The parents needed to find work and then work the hours that the job needed. It would have been so difficult for both parents and the child. On a personal opinion I do think finding affordable, quality childcare is difficult even today!
I did not know this type of home existed. I understand she wanted to get a nursing degree so she could take care of herself and her daughter but she certainly did make a mistake. Even without her mother in law doing the horrific things she did I imagine it would have been so hard for her and her daughter to be separated only seeing each other occasionally. I would think her daughter felt abandoned. Really like being in an orphanage.
I did know these homes existed in the 1930’s. I was once in a Memoir group and one of our members wrote extensively about living in such a home. She too was left there (along with her younger brother) when her mother went in search of work. Like Evie’s placement the home seemed loving. However it didn’t replace her mother. Her mother eventually returned to claim her children, but it was obvious from her writings that the experience left its mark.
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I did not know there were such homes where children could be left when a parent was going to school. My husbands father was left in a home with a family after a divorce. I wish I had known this when he was still alive to know more about his experience. My own mother and her sister were sent to a boarding school again due to a divorce. In their case it wasn’t a trauma and they had a relationship with both parents after that year.
It almost sounds like extended daycare so that mom can work - or as some noted like boarding school. From the book, it sounds like it was working well for Becca and even Evie - until Mildred stepped in.
Yes, I knew these kind of homes existed. My sister-in-law and brother-in-law were left in just such a home. They were forever traumatized by the experience. What else could Becca do under the circumstances? She had no family to rely upon and no other support structure in her life. This was a difficult but necessary decision. I can’t imagine making such a decision but I’ve always been blessed with a large family and friend network. Even as a single mother, I had women friends who networked with me to make sure all of our children had the care they needed.
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I had no idea that such children’s homes existed in the 1930’s. I think I would have been distrustful of such a place, afraid that if I left my child there, that I might not get her back. However, times were so difficult, people made choices that they might not have made in better economic times.
I did not know about this type of children’s home. It surprised me but I know it was a time of different options than we have now. Everyone does not have family that can help, and they did not have the same social supports we do. This seemed an accepted way to handle things, at that time. While I cannot imagine making that decision myself, I do not know that feeling of desperation. Becca was thinking of this as a short-term solution. While all homes may not have been the same, this one seemed warm and inviting for Evie. As others mentioned, it seemed like a boarding school type of environment. Communication between parent and child seemed well maintained. And the people running the home seemed warm and supportive. It was only when Mildred managed to legally take over that it all went wrong.
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Yes, I was aware of this type of facility. I believe in Cher bio, she mentions her father left her in one similar to this, so her Mother could work different shifts. In the early 30’s, coming out of the Depression, securing safe childcare was difficult, just as it is today
I was aware of these homes, because I had a former neighbor who had been placed in one of these orphanages after his mother died when he was young, and his father could not afford to care for him alone and had zero parenting skills. Becca had no choice. I think the author did a good job of showing how difficult this was for Becca. I have a large family who would have helped me, so I honestly can’t imagine…
I knew there were lots of orphanages but also a lot of abandoned children. Becca saw only three choices—go on as she was, possibly even starving; place Evie in a temporary home; or send her to live with her mother-in-law. Becca thought her choice was reasonable since she could see Evie weekly, but she hadn’t counted on her mother-in-law’s determination to have her grandchild. Had Becca thought more clearly, she might have found a way to work with the woman in spite of the personal cost. As it was, Becca was incredibly fortunate that Evie was stolen away to a good home, otherwise she would not only have lost Evie as she did, but Evie’s environment would be negative. As much as she loved Evie, I think that in the same position I would have tried everything to be accepted by the mother-in-law for the sake of the child.
I had no idea these homes existed. Becca really had no other options–extensive job searching proved fruitless and she was quickly running out of money to support herself and Evie. Had Mildred not interfered, I think it would have been a perfect solution. I don’t know if children’s homes exist any longer but finding good day care is still a problem today.
I didn’t have any idea these homes existed, either. I was kind of horrified, actually. I realize that they were necessary - that they provided a way for women in particular to get enough of an education to survive - but all I could think about was the potential for abuse.
I did not know these homes existed. I understand why Becca put her daughter in the home as she was desperate to make a life for herself and her daughter. I’m not sure I could have done that but I guess you never know until it is a choice you faced with.
I knew about children’s homes when I grew up in the late 40s and early 50s. I really didn’t understand how these homes existed now I do after reading this book. I think Becca had very few choices in order to provide for Evie. She certainly couldn’t continue living in the “boarding house”. Her car was stolen. She couldn’t get a job. She couldn’t go and live with Mildred either. Going to nursing school for a few months seemed the only option. I would hope to not have to make these choices. Thank goodness I don’t have such circumstances
I did not know those kinds of homes existed. I believe it was the right decision given what she was trying to accomplish. Would I, could I? Yes, if i was broke, alone, had minimal support and wanted a better life for me and my child. Like her, i would have struggled. To have the strength to make those tough choices is very impressive.
I didn’t know that this type of home existed in the 1930s but I did know of orphanages from other books, although they were not as caring as this one. I would have probably done something similar had I wanted to make a decent living. As it was, I moved back with my parents after my divorce so that I could get my degree and provide a better life for my son.
I was unaware of such homes. All I have ever read about are homes run by nuns that were terrible.