On page 128, Lottie opines that the real secret to life might be to “stop trying to clean up everybody else’s mess, and concentrate on your own.” Do you think this is accurate? Why or why not?
Mostly I agree. We are responsible for ourselves; however, there are many times when others need help be it family members, a work situation and a greater social issue. Messes surround us. We need to ask what can I do, should or not do and consider the consequences.
We’re all responsible for the outcomes of our own actions and we are best serviced by being aware of those things within our personal lives and addressing them. This includes, however, our awareness of other people in our lives, and efforts to provide assistance when needed, to watch for opportunities to offer help to groups or individuals who may be too reluctant to ask for it. A kind act is an enrichment for the recipients and for the giver.
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I like your last sentence. Well said!
I can like the idea behind what she says although I can’t condone what that meant for Lottie in particular. I also think that we may not always be able to clean up everyone else’s mess, but (especially when it comes to family) we should be willing to help when needed/asked.
I agree. You have to live your own life first. Instead of meddling in someone else’s life you need to make sure that you are working every day to keep your own life neat and tidy and on the right track. Help, if it is asked for, but otherwise tend to your own business and let others tend to theirs.
This sentence really struck me. Sometimes I have found someone so busy giving opinions on how someone else could improve/grow/change but they don’t do those same things for themselves. Sometimes people don’t want any help.
I do think we are responsible for working on ourselves to be the best we can. But I also think helping others is important. The greatest gift is kindness, it is a gift to the person who receives it but it also a gift to the giver, as we feel we have helped.
It’s true. Especially for women. We are caretakers. We look after everyone else and make sure their needs are met before thinking about our own. That should end at some point so that we can enjoy our own lives. That doesn’t mean we stop caring. But there is also a time to let others manage their own lives – sink or swim – because it’s the kindest approach, in the long run. I see too many people in my age range still babying their adult children. They’ll never grow up if their parents don’t let them.