After Michael leaves, Cath cuts him off and doesn’t exchange letters with him again for decades even when he tries to find her. What did you think of this? Was she right to move on, or should she have reconciled with him?
I’d be for reconciliation but she knew Michael would always love the sea so I think she was cutting her losses.
I’m not for a reconciliation. I think that Cath should have been more important to him than anything else and I think once she realized that she wasn’t things would never be the same. I believe she was right to move on with her life. Even though her life might have been easier to have reconciled, it would have meant she was settling, and not being true to herself.
Catherine was ahead of her time, standing up to Michael’s abandonment. She lived independently, made her own path, and didn’t succumb to the wishes of family members or friends who tried to dissuade her from staying “lost.”
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I felt Catherine was unlike most women of her time and was able to stand up for what she wanted and support herself. I do feel she was stubborn not to answer him. I think for someone who was so independent a letter that said..I’m done. Don’t contact me. was due. It was also very unfair to his sister. I also think that Catherine would have been less bitter, if she had just said, I’m done with you.
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I agree that Catherine was wise to not reconcile with Michael. It was obvious he was married to the sea and she would never be first in his life.
I didnt like that she cut him off cold. I understand her anger and disappointment that he left but I think her losing the baby.pushed her over the edge. If she wasnt ever going to reconcile, why didnt she consider being with Patrick.
I had a hard time with this part of the book. It seemed to me that Cath should have made more of an effort to communicate with Michael about her expectations; if those discussions were not productive, then could have cut all ties with no regrets.
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Catherine’s rejection of Michael was based more on the loss of their child and anger for Michael not being there. She did not necessarily hate him. I don’t think a reconciliation would have been possible because at their core they were very different people.
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I get why she wanted to part from him, but her refusal to let him know that she was okay was cruel. I also thought her making the sister not say anything was also cruel.
I thought she should have replied, so they could have had a chance to reconcile. She seemed bitter because he did not keep his promise, but he did eventually return, married, and had a family and children. Her life could have been different, but she was intent on doing what she wanted most, becoming a governess.
I don’t think Michael was the type to be happy being an involved stay at home husband. He was in love with the sea and this is not conducive to married life. It was a difficult decision and certainly not a standard path at that time, but I did respect Cath for choosing her path. (But in my heart, I don’t like when people today “ghost” others and her not responding to his letters did bother me.)
My feelings are somewhere in the middle. What he promised her when they married and what he did were opposite. And after he abandoned her, she lost their baby and had to deal with it alone. For those reasons, I understand her decision to cut ties. That said, I thought it was unfair to involve his sister. I expect she didn’t feel she had the option (socially or religiously) to divorce him and, given the time period, that makes sense. But she deprived herself of true love with Patrick with her decision.